3.7 out of 5

Ok let’s have a serious conversation about Jake’s dill chips.  Are you sitting down?  If you’re not sitting down, maybe you should.  Unless you can read standing up, then disregard the suggestion and proceed to the next sentence.  Some time ago I received a box in the mail.  Inside that box was 2 jars of pickles.  One of those jars of pickles was Jake’s Dill Chips.  It was arguably one of the worst dill chips I’ve ever had.  I even joked about the fact that they were cut up by a cartoon character with an axe with no interest in consistency or crunch.  It was the worst pickle I have ever ranked.  Jake’s – Dill Chips

That’s of course only until the great Passion Pickle debacle of 2024 brought forth a new champion of mushy disgust.  Passion Pickles – Habanero Homestyle Chips – Sweet + Heat

Fast forward 12+ months.  The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, it’s the first 80 degree day of the year, and I find a box of pickles sitting on my front porch.   When I open this box there are 2 jars of pickles.  One of these jars of pickles is Jake’s Dill Chips.   I stare at it confused and can only think about why the fuck this stupid jar of pickles is back in my life. It stares back at me like it’s always been here, and always been a part of me.  

I thought to myself, I know you and I’m not going to let you do this to me again.  But something felt different this time.  The jar was more clear than I remember.  The chips look like someone who isn’t a cartoon character with an axe ,cut them into reasonable sizes.   Somehow the whole thing felt more inviting, so I did what it wanted.  I put it in the refrigerator and waited.  If we are being honest, I don’t remember how long I waited, but it may have been as long as 2 weeks.  I was interested, not excited.  Anyway, once I finally got involved the experience was completely different than I remembered.  Although some of the chips were a bit beefier than others, it was not at all the mushy disaster I remember from my youth just 12.5 months ago.  They were not the best crunch I ever had, but it was completely reasonable. Maybe it was the fact that the pickle had a crunch this time, but the flavor was quite good.  Its still a lot different then most standard dill chips and I’d say its mostly the turmeric, but still has a flavor and bite that deserves respect.  I’m not sure if the last jar was a complete disaster, or if they saw my prior review and realized they needed to take a look a themselves and make a change, but it’s better.  I would buy this pickle.  You hear that Jake?  I’d buy your pickle!  By the way did you ever sit down?  If you were sitting down you can get up now, if you weren’t sitting down maybe take five, relax and have one of Jake’s Dill Chips.  Hopefully your jar was filled by a human, and not a axe wielding cartoon character.