3.3 out of 5

This whole ranch pickle situation is confusing.  You don’t know if you really ever wanted a ranch pickle.  You want a lot of ranch things.  Hidden valley ranch popcorn seasoning? Sure do.  Ranch dusted French fries with a side of ranch for dipping?  Yes please. Bagel bites? Ok….Is that pizza on a bagel?  Yes.  Does that mean I can have pizza anytime?  Sure does.  With a side of ranch? God, I hope so. So since it’s pretty clear nobody has ever asked – Can I have a ranch pickle? – I’ll dive in to the sweet deets you never wanted to know.   The ranch is understated and this is a straight up cucumber so you don’t get a very pickled flavor.  The ranch balances well with the light pickling although it does leave something to be desired and it’s hard to say what that is. You find yourself wanting more but it’s unclear if it’s because it’s delicious or confusing and hiding something. You wouldn’t be mad if they showed up in front of you, but you won’t find yourself running to the store in search of them. Also the crunch is much better than expected based on the terrible jar/labeling.  I think ranch has a special place in most people’s lives, I just don’t think that place is in a pickle jar.  It’s probably on half a head of lettuce with an unhealthy amount of bacon bits.